The Super Whites The ordinary life of a Super Mum

The Super Whites
This is me.

This week a blogger I like and respect wrote a very interesting blog post which made me do a lot of deep thinking. For a while, since the blogging conference I attended in March, I have been feeling confused about why I blog. I have been wrapped up in what other bloggers think, feeling sad that I seem to constantly comment on other bloggers blogs and no one seems to come back to me. Frustrated that everyone seems to be reviewing the same washing powder and getting invited to the same functions but none of the invitations are coming my way.

I have been doing a lot of thinking about how I could go about things differently or change things and then suddenly, it all became clear. Nothing needs to change, except my attitude. I have been blogging for nearly 5 years and have no need of followers or links or comments. I began this blog for myself, my family, my friends. If someone stumbles on my blog then I hope they like it but I sure as hell am not going to beat myself up any more if they don’t stick around or leave me a gushing comment or link to my blog. I have been all muddled up because of what other people are doing and saying on the internet and its clouded my judgement. I don’t want to do sponsored giveaways or competitions. I can barely find the time to update my blog let alone manage random number generators and postage details!

I didn’t start blogging to make friends, or collect followers. I started blogging before Facebook made it so easy to share your life with friends and family. I don’t have a facebook page for my blog, in fact most of my “friends” on facebook don’t know I have a blog and I prefer to keep it that way. I blog about my life which is personal but I don’t mind sharing what I blog about, I am comfortable with my level of disclosure and I don’t feel the need to defend my decision to blog about my children to anyone. Thanks to my blog I have met some incredible people, a few of which I feel privileged enough to call friends now.

So, where to now? Well, I am working on a little Terms & Conditions for my blog to help people understand what I am about. I am a non-blogger blogger. If that makes any sense. Its unlikely I will be accepting any products to review from PR companies and I won’t be soliciting for invitations to any events, you won’t find any washing powder reviews on this blog! I won’t be putting any ads in my sidebar and I am under no illusions that this blog is going to earn me an income going forward. No one owes me anything on the internet! I will continue to comment on my favourite blogs but if they don’t come back and comment on mine, their loss, not mine. I will continue to develop relationships with those bloggers that I like and respect and will spend more time focusing on my own writing style and trying to post more regularily. I am excluding myself from the popularity contests that seem to have overtaken the internet recently and I can finally stop feeling bad for not wanting to take part in any of the many link-ups that are all over the place!

This is me, this is my life, this is five years of incredible change and growth and babies and houses and married life and following my passions. What you see here on this blog is what makes me, me. Its my personality, its my place to share and no one else is going to dictate the terms to which I do it!

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24 Responses to This is me.

  1. Liss says:

    Whoah!! You go Sarah!! I’m a frequent visitor but I’m a crappy commenter. I really need to work on that. But I think your blog is only as valuable as you think it is, not anyone else. I live by that! I love your photos and your style – I don’t want that to ever change and either should you! xx

  2. Great post.

    It is silly for bloggers to worry about everyone else otherwise they all start sounding the same. Looking the same and reviewing the same washing powder is not much fun for us readers.

    I also expect the vote for me things to disappear soon, or maybe I am just hoping they will. I have vote for me fatigue.

  3. Great post. I think every blogger, at some point, has that moment where they think ‘why am I doing this’? Awesome that you came up with such a clear answer.
    Life In A Pink Fibro recently posted..Theres a cafe in town

  4. Alex says:

    Like Liss, I’m also a crappy commenter. I like to read posts but I seldom have anything interesting to add.

    Today I ummed and ahhed as to whether or not to buy a ticket to a blogging conference and finally decided not to. I confess to sometimes trying to catch up to the ‘cool blogs’ then wonder why I’m bothering when none of that stuff really matters to me. I blog for amusement. I love it when people comment because often, they’re wittier than I am. But I like free stuff too – helps to explain away the monstrous internet bills.
    Alex recently posted..My Favourite Things

  5. Corinne says:

    Good for you!! I agree, blogging is about finding your spot. I, too, have recently re-evaluated my blogging life and feel so much happier and comfortable in my blog and in my skin.

    I like my little spot on the web, if others happen to too, then great but it’s not the be all and end all.

    I love your blog the way it is! X

  6. Joh says:

    Hi! I just found you from a tweet from tiggymooshoo:) It is all about networking isn’t it? It’s so random sometimes how we find each other though:)
    I have been through periods of heavy promotion amongst other bloggers and usually at the end of it all, I run out of time. I love to do product reviews and I get a thrill when I write something that creates high traffic. At the end of the day though, it’s just a fun hobby for me and I don’t have the time to actively seek traffic and advertising. My blog would be my work if I did.
    Joh recently posted..Full Moon in Sagittarius – Total Lunar Eclipse – 16th June 2011

  7. Kate says:

    I think there would be so many people for whom this post would resonate. Bravo for writing it.

    March to your own beat. It makes life so much more enjoyable.

  8. Joani says:

    I’m glad you don’t review products!
    I read a lot of blogs, mostly decorating ones, and yours is the only one I’ve ever commented on. Not sure what that says about me, lurking in the closet! But I agree with you, if it’s not meaningful to you it becomes a chore. You’ll have this for your girls to look at when they grow up, and you’ll be able to re-live all these memories you blogged about when they are older. I hope you continue blogging, it’s been fun getting to know you!

  9. BabyMacBeth says:

    Great post Sarah! I love that you have it sorted out and the T & C is such a smart idea! Stay strong…I hope to have your clarity sometime soon!

  10. Trish says:

    Much ‘food’ for thought her Sarah.
    Your blog is lovely and I love your photos and life stories.
    I am just a slack commenter and I get my links via twitter or facebook lately.
    I feel overwhelmed sometimes trying to comment on my favourite blogs or just new ones I discovered and I want to encourage.
    I get a lot of comments un returned ? if you know what I mean.
    I don’t mind doing some reviews and attending PR events because they are fun. It’s all very new in the blogging scene I think to many bloggers. I still don’t see what we offer the ‘Brands’ except a small voice speaking to a minority.
    I am re thinking doing some reviews and only doing ones that matter to me from now on – those with good free stuff or relevant .
    I don’t do it for fame only free stuff and I enter comps for the same reason.
    It is like Joh said a fun hobby I can do from home ( while my boys run wild and bother no one but me.)
    Trish recently posted..Wordless Wednesday – A sparkle in the night

  11. I don’t think I really “get” the whole Aussie blog scene. There might be one in SA, but I’m not part of it really.
    Having said that, I have been asked a few times to punt things on my blog but I won’t do it – I think it’s taking advantage of people, like going to a dinner party and spending the whole time trying to sell a pyramid scheme or something.
    By the same token I don’t bother to read any post that’s “reviewing” something. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I like non-blogger blogs.
    The Jackson Files recently posted..Possibly the weirdest conversation I have ever had- ever

  12. Well said! your blog is fab the way it is and a wonderful record of your kids’ childhood for them to read one day 🙂
    Alice (Thrifted Treasure) recently posted..So childish!

  13. Erica says:

    As one of the “friends and family” out there, I’d like to say that your blog has done a brilliant job of keeping is connected, far more so than brief Facebook status updates. I feel I know all the members of your family and have really been part of the whole journey. Thank you for all the hours and hours of effort that had taken X

  14. Sarah says:

    Keep doing what you’re doing – just as long as you want to.
    I reckon I’m a pretty faithful commenter – and the reason for that boils down to the fact that I really like you and your blog. That’s all.
    Sarah recently posted..Wet long weekend

  15. Fe says:

    Well, as someone who now has a treasured IRL relationship with you, I heartily concur… and thank you for creating this space so that we could meet 🙂

    The more the “Aussie Blogging Community” became about monetisation and clout and SEO, the more my insanely personal blog began to feel vulnerable and unsafe. It’s no coincidence that my blog is now 100% password protected. It happened when a blogging friend accidently “outed” me on Twitter, but I think that act simply sped up the inevitable.

    Blogging has changed. I love that you still blog with a truthful, non-show-offy voice. As do I (I hope).

    Fe recently posted..and then…

  16. Krin says:

    Must have been the day for reflecting on blogging:
    Also, I adore reading about your life, and the girls and Ron, your thoughts on photography, etc. and would be less adoring of reading of reviews of washing powder, and wouldn’t know what I was voting for if you asked me to vote on something.

    Internet celebritydom is enticing, but take it from a former internet radio DJ with fanboys, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.

  17. Veronica says:

    I think I might love you, quite a bit. xxx
    Veronica recently posted..What I’m reading and a giveaway of books

  18. Jane says:

    Hi Sarah This is my first comment and it’s for a ripper post. Good for you. I can only echo your sentiments. Keep on keeping on! J x
    Jane recently posted..Our Monopoly game- Collect 200 salary as you pass Go

  19. Pingback: Stunned, like a mullet. | The Super Whites

  20. Caz says:

    Yay you. Blog the way your heart tells you. There are no rules (even thou sometimes people think there are). It’s all about you. Personally I love holding giveaways – and you actually just won my last one!! (Bakers Delight $25). But that’s me. I Love to read blogs written from the heart – they are my fav by far. I think you can tell when people write that way – whether they are review/popularist or not. Continue to follow your heart and forget the rest of the stuff that doesn’t interest you. Love the way you are standing up for what your believe in sister!!!
    Caz recently posted..WIN- 25 from Bakers Delight today – Sourdough bread review Giveaway closed

  21. Carol says:

    I read religiously but don’t comment. Love they way you write and I feel so in touch with what you are up to. Don’t change your style or your content PLEASE! x

  22. Hi Sarah,
    I came across your blog today via a tweet and found this post. This is my first time here but I could resonate with you so much that I had to leave a comment.
    I have been blogging for years now and I often comment on other blogs and comment from my heart and not for the heck of it. But, I don’t see the gesture returned and that did not feel good initially. But, now, I have sorted it out. What I am doing is for my joy and satisfaction. Hence, it does not matter if someone is not being supportive. I will continue on the path unfazed. Hats off to your principles and clarity. I like your style of writing. 🙂

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