The Super Whites The ordinary life of a Super Mum

The Super Whites

As we were leaving preschool yesterday afternoon, Amy tripped and fell down the steep flight of stairs. It happened in an instant and I saw her body somersault and watched her land with her neck at an improbable angle. I have no idea how I made it down the stairs whilst holding Stella in my arms but I was at the bottom step, scooping Amy up and all I remember was crying out “Oh my god”.

For a split second I thought she must have broken her neck, she fell face first, hit the concrete and brick and then flew arse over head to land on her chest with her head at an insane angle. She was crying and gasping and Stella was crying and I was trying to work out if I should have left her on the ground and stabilised her neck or if I should just continue to cradle her as close as I could and whispering in her ear “you’re ok, you’re ok, you’re ok” over and over as though I could rewind time and fix her.

The preschool teachers were by my side in a second with icepacks and tissues and comfort. Amy was able to sit up and move her neck from side to side and focus on my face but I could see the egg on her head developing and her chest was grazed and bleeding. I had moments of indecision and was just so angry with myself for not knowing how to make it all better. I knew she was alright but yet I was so afraid that something had come lose or broken inside her and I wouldn’t know until it was too late. She was clasping the icepack to her chest and crying, saying “Mummy, I am really just so hurt” which was pitiful and frightening all at the same time.

In the end I decided to get Ron from work and then we could decide what to do together. In the car Amy drank some strawberry milk and ate some tiny teddy biscuits and calmed down although she cried sadly again when she saw her Daddy. At home she was able to walk and swing her arms and look up and down and she described the pain she was feeling as being the sting from the graze and not bruising. This morning the egg on her head was a soft, squishly lump with multi-hued tones of blue and yellow radiating out. There are slight bruises around her eyes and the graze on her chest is not sore anymore.

I couldn’t sleep last night, the slow motion replay going over and over and over in my mind. I kept thinking I should have been able to stop it from happening but thats impossible, I can’t stop bad things from happening, all I can do is make sure I am there to scoop up my girl and tell her over and over that its all going to be alright.

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